Session five#
Home practice#
What did I discover watching stressors and reactions, without intervening into them? What did I experience in the body, feelings, thoughts? At this moment, we only want to observe, learning to focus the microscope, creating space. Stay away from any pressure to achieve less stress, even though you might have already seen mindfulness reducing stress in some situations.
Sitting meditation#
Practicing “longer” (30–40 minutes) sitting meditation, which is also the home practice for the week to come.
Be mindful of judgmental thoughts about the practice (it is going “good” or “bad”). Craving for something & judging whether we got it or not: one of our strong autopilots, often flying under the radar of awareness. Thoughts like “I should think less” or “I should try harder” are similar. Doubts can also arise, about myself (“I am no good.”) or the practice (“What is this good for, anyway?”).
Meditation teaches us to have the confidence, that everything important (result, understanding oneself, …) comes by itself, through the present moment, always available for our attention.
After the practice, reflect: Was it possible to sometimes see thoughts as thoughts? Seeing them coming and letting them go? Was the guidance supportive in dealing with thoughts?.
Judgmental thoughts#
Judgment of situation fuelling stress happens quickly. It is often a part of positive feedback loops featuring body, feelings, thoughts. Awareness of the body is our subject-matter from the beginning of the course; thoughts are especially center-stage today; challening feelings, communication and behavior will be our focus in the sessions to come.
Perception in stressful situation is tunnel-like, caught up in autopilots, including repetitive judgmental patters. Situation itself is stressful only when it there is the respective judgment. Externally identical situation will be stressful for one, pleasant for another. Of note: stress can be cause solely internally, without any external input (remember your last sleepless night).
Research describes contextuality of memory; memories tend to emerge in similar situations. E.g. in a situation of feeling failure, memories of all previous failures tend to come up, easily leading to simplified self-judgment, further increasing stress (“I always fail”).
The autopilot of thinking is devious as we tend to believe our thoughts. We reduce the magic power of thoughts in meditation, seeing them as mere thoughts, mental events without any particular significance. Patient mindfulness (both during the formal practice, and outside) contributes to losening the grip of thoughts, without losing the ability to think when needed; there is more freedom and choice: to follow a thought and to not follow a thought.
Practice#
Try the following exercise; it was done in dyads during the session. At home, you can records yourself and then listen to the recording.
Set a timer for 3 minutes. Ask yourself aloud: Which thoughts make my stress and life challenging? Speak to the point for 3 minutes (you may also be silent for a while, if appropriate), looking into yourself; speaking from the heart, not from the head, about what is alive in you right now.
Play the recording back. Watch your inner reactions as you listen to yourself speaking.
Set a timer for 3 minutes with another question: Which strategies I have to cope with those thoughts?
Listen to yourself again, tuned into your experience of listening.
Open the workbook, go through the Stress-increasing thoughts (5.3) check-list, marking thoughts sounding familiar.
What you see is part of your inner life. As a motivation for further practice: ask yourself whenter you want to listen to these thoughts for the rest of your life, or you would like to do something about it?
Also read the section on Mind traps, typical thought-patterns in which the mind might get trapped. Mindfulness can help to get back on our feet.
Conclusion#
Read other texts in section 5 of the workbook. Do dedicate time to the daily home practice; what you put in is what you get back.